Keep scrolling to see Johnny Cotton’s NFT Collection featuring old Instagram posts. Stare at the photos long enough and you’ll see an object that was around before the Internet. Of course, you’d have to have BEEN around before the Internet in order to spot it! 😜😜💃💃
What’s Old is New Again
On August 10, 2019, Johnny decided to revisit one of his old stomping grounds, the Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel. Believe me when I tell you, he had a MUCH better time that night than when he worked there 14 years prior! 🍸🍸🍸
What’s Old is New Again (Reverse)
Back in 2019, Johnny knew absolutely NOTHING about getting the same shot, but reverse. Apparently, there’s this app called Flip Image, and what a wonder it is! 🤩🤩
What’s Old is New Again (3)
This is one of the few shots that Johnny could’ve put in either the “Nocturnal” or the “Relic” Collections. At least we don’t have to worry about getting a REVERSE angle, right? 😎😎📸📸
Two Sides of the Same Coin
Not really sure if this should go in “Johnny Nocturnal” or “Spot the Relic”, but it works! 💃💃💋💋
Too Dark, Yet Still Handsome!
Seriously Johnny, get a ring light! You almost look African. Not that there’s anything wrong with that! 😘😘📸📸
Before Thang Was Born
On August 25, 2019, Johnny posted a selfie that he took a year earlier when he went out with some friends for a birthday lunch. 🤩🤩🍽️🍽️
Before Thang Was Born (2)
Funny thang about “Before Thang Was Born” was that Johnny didn’t know what a TRIPOD was, so shots like these had to be taken by his friends. I remember my friend asking me in this shot, “Do you want me to get ALL of you?” 😂😂😂
Vendange for the Win!
Remember that shot outside of Trejo’s Cantina in Hollywood under “Spot the Relic?” This is a side shot. Love the Vendange box in the corner, huh! 😂😂🍸🍸
Vendange for the Win! (Reverse)
On this particular night, Johnny was tripping because it had been so long since he had worn this skirt that he forgot it didn’t have a DRAWSTRING! 😮😮👗👗
Club Blowing Up On a Sunday!
Going back to that night at the W Hotel on Nov. 19, 2019, Johnny was tripping because his jersey made his stomach look too big. Of course, it could have been the STOMACH that made his stomach look too big! 😂😂😂
Before the You-Know-What Hit the Fan!
On January 16, 2020, Johnny posted about going to see ‘fam up in Portland. This was a stop at Seattle-Tacoma airport.
Once the You-Know-What Hit the Fan!
On August 28, 2020, Johnny posted a random selfie at Dunsmore Park in Glendale, CA. I won’t tell you exactly what the You-Know-What is, but if you look at the date and the mask, you’ll know!
After the You-Know-What Hit the Fan!
(Sitting)
By now, you should already have figured out what the You-Know-What is. In case you need a reminder, this was August 28, 2020 at Dunsmore Park in Glendale, CA.
Last Bit About the You-Know-What Hitting the Fan!
Last angle of the shots taken at Dunsmore Park in Glendale, CA on August 28, 2020. If you couldn’t figure it out by now, the You-Know-What hitting the fan is the COVID-19 Pandemic! 😱😱😱
The Not-That-Old Man and the Sea!
On September 14, 2020, Johnny posted on Instagram about a weekend staycation he had with friends in Hermosa Beach. 🏖️🏖️
The Not-That-Old Man and the Sea! (2)
Continuing with that September 14, 2020 post about Hermosa Beach, this is a standing shot of Johnny. 🏖️🏖️
Before Johnny Learned to Consolidate His Posts
Sticking with that same weekend of September 14, 2020, Johnny posted another selfie on Instagram, this time from the Redondo Beach Marina. Despite the title, I’m not sure if it even SHOULD have been consolidated with the previous post, since it was a separate day and location? ⛵⛵💃💃
Thanged Up at Target
On February 22, 2021, Johnny posted on Instagram after a FIVE MONTH absence: A time that saw him welcome back an unwanted house guest as well as fail at starting a voiceover career, yet again. 🎙️🎙️👜👜
Thanged Up at Target (Reverse)
Going back to that Feb. 22, 2021 post, apparently Johnny didn’t know how to FLIP IMAGES yet. But now he does! 👡👡📸📸
St. Patty’s Day on Palms
On March 17, 2021, Johnny shot some selfies on the corner of Palms and Mentone before meeting his friend. If you can’t figure it out, it was St. Patrick’s Day! ☘️☘️👡👡
Just Practicing at Target in Burbank, CA
This shot actually didn’t make it into any social media apps. Johnny was just practicing his poses. 😜😜📸📸
Mother’s Day, 2021 (1)
On May 10, 2021, Johnny posted on IG from the Americana at Brand in Glendale, CA. He was actually there the day before for a Mother’s Day celebration with friends. 🍸🍸👡👡
Mother’s Day, 2021 (2)
Staying with that May 10, 2021 IG post: This is the day Johnny discovered a pop-up restaurant known as “Nonna’s Empanadas.” Very tasty! 😋😋🫓🫓
Mother’s Day, 2021 (3)
Even though the original post was from May 10, 2021, this shot was actually posted on IG on June 28, 2021. What’s funny about that post is Johnny thought he had a problem with the scale, and he was less than 180 POUNDS! 🤣🤣😭😭
Not the Same Relic, but…
On the 4th of July in 2021, Johnny posted this photo from the now-defunct Off Vine restaurant in Hollywood. Stare at the photo long enough and you’ll see a relic, just not the same one you’ve been seeing this whole time. 🍴🍴👡👡
Thanksgiving, 2021
On Thanksgiving in 2021, Johnny visited his dear friends in the Inland Empire, whose family had grown by one at the time. He posted this shot on Instagram on November 25, 2021. 🦃🦃👡👡
Holiday Season, 2021 (1)
On December 9, 2021, Johnny posted on IG about flying up to Portland to visit family. Normally, he would go AFTER the holidays around January 22; the same date as one of his niece’s birthdays. But that year, he was guilt-tripped by one of his OTHER nieces, so he switched it up. ✈️✈️🎄🎄
Holiday Season, 2021 (2)
Still on that December 9, 2021 post: So I JUST noticed how Google Photos now has a FLIP IMAGE feature. What’s’ interesting about this is the old version of Photos had Flip Image, but the new one did not, prompting me to go to a separate app titled…Flip Image. But now I don’t have to do that! 😎😎👡👡
Holiday Season, 2021 (3)
Nope, still on that December 9, 2021 IG post: Have a seat, Johnny. And blow ’em a 💋💋 while you’re at it! 😎😎👡👡
Not the Same Relic, but Still Ancient (1)
December 16,2021: Johnny posted on IG about heading to Best Buy and buying a SiriusXM radio. 📻📻🏈🏈👡👡
Not the Same Relic, but Still Ancient (2)
Sticking with that December 16, 2021 IG post: What’s so funny about this purchase is that Johnny ended up DROPPING SiriusXM about three years later, only to pick it back up about three months after that! 😥😥📻📻
Tha’ Queen (1)
On October 22, 2025, after three days of scuffling with Gemini, Johnny finally figured out a way to fit the Relic onto “The Start of the Jersey-Dress Grind” girl; thus making her Tha’ Queen! 👸👸👡👡🤤🤤
Oops, I Shot It Again! (1)
On March 4, 2026, Johnny had a photo shoot in this lovely little village in Thousand Oaks, CA…a mere 5 miles and 5 hours from where Britney Spears got a DUI. Talk about coincidence, because look at his 👡👡! Very Y2K, no? 😎😎
Oops, I Shot It Again! (2)
March 4, 2026. Talk about messed up: Johnny actually posted a video mocking Britney Spears’ DUI the next day on TikTok, hoping to become the next Chris Crocker-type viral star. But the algorithm said “No Dice!” Normally, he wouldn’t kick somebody when they’re down like that, but like I said, he was trying to go viral! 🤷🤷🎶🎶
Oops, I Shot It Again! (3)
March 4, 2026. What’s really funny about this shoot is that Johnny almost came up with an Oops himself. The shoot took about 90 minutes, which is an extraordinarily long time for him, and towards the end, the head of the local homeowners association came out and grilled him on what he was doing. Apparently some of the locals had called about some big black guy photographing their HOMES! 😰😰📸📸
Oops, I Shot It Again! (4)
March 4, 2026. Funny thang about this shoot; you wanna know exactly how fast a grown man can walk in platform sandals, you should’ve seen Johnny trying to get away from this homeowner guy who FOLLOWED him all the way back to his car. “Gimme three steps, gimme three steps, mister!” 🏃♂️🏃♂️😨😨
Oops, I Shot It Again! (5)
March 4, 2026: That date is also special because that night, Johnny decided to ARCHIVE all of the shots that weren’t good enough to make it onto social media instead of throwing them away. From that point on, the Also-Rans were kept on his Facebook profile. 📸📸👡👡
Oops, I Shot It Again! (6)
Last note on March 4, 2026. That day, or perhaps a day or two later, Johnny finally figured out the key to going viral (or at least as viral as HE can get). The key is, not only does each social media app have a different rule as to WHEN to post, but HOW to post. For instance, YouTube likes videos where the subject MOVES a lot (i.e., dancing), while Instagram likes it when you SHARE your shot with some sort of landmark or cultural marker. TikTok? The key to going viral there is just to PAY to promote your post. That’s all I can do since I don’t really spend a lot of time on TikTok. 🤷🤷😰😰
