No Kings, huh? No PALACES either, I guess! Um…hey everybody. It’s Johnny again…and boy, have I got a story to tell you! Well, actually…the story might not be that exciting. It basically involves celebrities being put in their place. Which, in any other generation would have been newsworthy. But you guys have been putting celebrities in their place for years now, so it’s probably no biggie to you. I can hear you saying, “Go on, Mr. Famous Person. Go ahead and act like you’re a somebody. I’ll just chill out on my phone with TikTok and what not and I won’t be spending any of my money on any of your 💩💩 movies!” Yeah, you guys don’t give a damn about famous people, so what I’m about to say won’t come as a big surprise to you. Let me back up a bit:
The year was 2005 and Hollywood was in the midst of its “Famous For Being Famous” era. You remember that, dont’cha? You remember all those party girls who were so famous they didn’t even need a last name: Britney, Lindsey, Paris…etc. Well, at the center of all that was this club located on the rooftop of the Mondrian Hotel called Skybar. Now you might think I’m lying, but back then, this place was so hot, that even some of the celebrities couldn’t get in! Oh, you just won an Oscar, huh? Great, we’ll just put you on the GUEST LIST! 🤯🤯 And now, not only are they letting idiots like me in, but this is what the joint looks like now.
And I’m sorry. I know the rest of the country was out protesting against ICE and marching and looting last Friday night, but I just had to get this place crossed off my Bucket List. I mean, if only the younger me could only see me now! That guy who once stood outside the club with an earpiece and a walkie-talkie is now doing his Vogue Model sexy thang on the poolside sofa!
But unlike most of the people in the club, I still don’t have the luxury of being DRIVEN to the venue. But that’s OK. I got a new system in place where not only will I be driving to the club, (like I did for the Golden Globes and Oscars) but I’ll actually be UBERING someone else to the same general area. 
Then, I’ll find a garage or corner to park on, somewhere around Hollywood or Sunset or Santa Monica Boulevards, and take the BUS to the venue. Should be a straight shot to anywhere you wanna go. We go to the venue, we drink a little, then we hit up a 24-Hour diner, take the bus back to the car, sleep it off, drive home; night complete! That, I believe, will take care of both the Transportation problem as well as the Club problem.
Alright Dear Readers (BOTH of you! 😂😂), that’s all I got for this week. Don’t expect fabulousness like this every week, because my job(s) still suck. But they ain’t sucking the life out of me…not yet! Until next time, Love, Peace and 👡👡👡!
Johnny